Marie: Okay. Kindle?
Marie: Pen and paper?
Marie: Clothes, shoes and purse?
Marie: Vibrators, spreader bars and handcuffs?
Ollie: Yup…Wait what?!
Marie: Oh, so you are listening to me. Get your shit together Ollie. You promised you’d help me with this tour! I’m going out of my freaking mind and you’re sitting there on Facebook!
*Throws cushion at Ollie.*
Ollie: Hey! I’m here aren’t I? I’m dragging your shit around all week aren’t I? Quit whining at me. It’ll be fine. Besides, it’s me they really wanna see.
Marie: Oh yeah, course it is stud.
*Ollie sits up and winks at me, clearly pleased with how his fan base is growing. He holds his cell phone up to face me.*
Ollie: You see this? 130 likes! Suck on that Garrett.
Marie: Oh…yeah… I meant to talk to you about that.
*Ollie gives me a suspicious look and raises his eyebrow at me.*
Marie: Jared’s joining us on the tour.
*I duck for cover as the cushion fly’s back at me.*
Ollie: You are fucking kidding me right?
Marie: It’ll be fine! I’ve arranged it so that the two of you do interviews at least ten minutes apart. You never have to cross paths. But if, for whatever reason, you do…Please be good.
*I give him my sweetest. Pleading look.*
Ollie: Fine. But I’m doing this for my harem of fans. Not you. Well, maybe you a little. Will D, Nic, Karen and the girls all be there? I cannot wait to hang out with those crazy chicks. That reminds me…I need to pack some jello.
*Thinks about the women he’s referring to. Rolls eyes. Gives him a disapproving look.*
Ollie: Hey, I’m just giving the people what they want and if it also gives me something I want…Win, win. Someone is wrestling in that jello. All else fails, you be skins and we’ll do ourselves.
*He winks at me and gives me that cheeky Ollie grin. I swat him around the head.*
Marie: Douche. Are you ready to go or what? I see no bags or luggage of any kind.
Ollie: Looks like I’ll be skins then. I travel light.
Marie: Come on asshat. Let’s get this show on the road.
Ollie: Yes ma’am.
*Loading up the car*
Ollie: Remind me, were doing this because of the book you wrote about me?
Marie: Yes but the book isn’t just about you. Though I’m sure a lot of your fans wish it was. It’s about Layla. It’s her story. Her journey of self discovery, figuring out who she is and what she wants. It’s about the constant struggle she faces between listening to her head and heart and the feeling of being torn between a hot, playboy business man and a sizzling tattooed, pierced rocker. I know I wouldn’t wanna choose.
Ollie: Throw in some bad ass music, two crazy friends like Mel and Amy and you have yourself a best seller right?
Marie: We can only hope.
Ollie: Hope? Damn! Any book with me in it..best seller guaranteed.!